


Burn Baby Burn

by PavarottisRevenge (orphan_account)



Category: Glee, klaine - Fandom
Genre: Humor, M/M, PWP
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-15
Updated: 2016-12-15
Packaged: 2018-09-08 18:42:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8856598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/PavarottisRevenge
Summary: For every action there is a reaction.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [quizasvivamos](https://archiveofourown.org/users/quizasvivamos/gifts).



> This little ficlet is a gift that I promised a friend a long ass time ago... Sorry for the delay, Beth! LOVE YOU!!

The clouds overhead roar in anger as their fat tears drop to the earth with little to no care for the inhabits below. The heavy shadows from above coat everything with a blanket of hazy darkness, making it almost damn near impossible to navigate from point A, to point B.

  
With a grunt and whip of his hip, Blaine finally manages to out wrestle the brewing winds and open the broken door of the apartment complex.

  
Wiping his dirty shoes on the lobby welcome mat as he pats his hair back into place, the man nods his head in passing at one of his elderly neighbors.

“Hey, Mrs. Slocumb. Crappy weather today, huh?”

  
Sneering from under her yellow umbrella as she prepares to battle the havoc that is thrashing outside, Mrs. Slocumb grumbles back with a huff. “No shit, Sherlock.”

  
Choosing to ignore her snarky remark, now used to the bitterness of his neighbors, Blaine makes his way over to one of the three stairwells that rest to the left of an abandoned welcome desk.

“You too, Mrs. S. You too.”

  
Taking the first right off the second flight of stairs, Blaine pulls out his keyring and squints to find the right one. _Why is it so damn dark in here?_

  
Yipping in triumph when he finds the right key, Blaine pushes the ridged metal into the deadbolt and waits for that quick ‘unclick’ of the lock. With a relax of his shoulders and a sigh of content, Blaine Anderson walks through the entryway of his recently acquired downtown apartment. The very apartment that he shares with his highschool sweetheart, Kurt Hummel.

  
Closing the door behind him and turning the lock back on the deadbolt, the ex-warbler hangs his rain soaked jacket on it's assigned hook near the front door.

“Kurt, baby, I’m home!”

  
From somewhere inside the apartment comes a shouted reply, followed by a sharp clash of lightning from the brewing storm outside.

“In the living room, babe!”

  
Unable to see clearly due to the stale darkness around him, Blaine attempts to flip a switch as he walks by on his way to greet his boyfriend. “I think the light blew in the hallway!”

  
Turning in his recliner to face Blaine when he steps into the room, Kurt beams the flashlight under his chin and chuckles sinisterly. “Muwhaha.”

  
Raising an eyebrow in amusement, Blaine laughs at his boyfriend's weirdness. “I'm assuming the powers out?”

  
Flickering the light over to Blaine so the man in question could move forward without hurting himself, Kurt sighs. “Yes. Been out for about three hours now. I've called the landlord but he told me to light a candle and deal.”

  
Reaching his boyfriend, Blaine leans down to give him a quick peck on the lips. “Mmm, hey baby.”  Pulling his upper body back up, the shorter of the two rubs his tummy with an exaggerated flourish. “What’s for dinner? That workout left me starving.”

  
With a soft smile, Kurt teases. “Sweaty kisses. Gross.”

  
Rising from the black recliner and sidestepping around his boyfriend to head to the kitchen, Kurt motions for the other man to follow him. “I don’t know. I guess we’ll make something from whatever you picked up at the store.”

  
Stopping midstep, Blaine tilts his head in confusion as he attempts to think back through their conversations from earlier. “What now?”

  
Turning back around to face Blaine, Kurt rakes the flashlight over the other man's body with swift movements. “Speaking of groceries. Where's the bags?”

  
Looking over Kurt’s shoulders, Blaine spots the array of candles for the first time. The amount of said candles bringing back shivers from high school.

“Jesus, Kurt, are you trying to contact the other side or something?” Stepping around the man, Blaine picks up two candles and waves them at Kurt. “Do we really need this many candles lit?Better question, how many have you lit?”

  
“Twenty. Mostly in here, a few in the bedroom, but that's not important. Where’s the groceries?”

  
Placing the candles back down on the counter, Blaine scoots over to the fridge. “I didn't know I was supposed to grab any.”

  
Letting out a puff of aggravation, Kurt leans his back to the counter and crosses his arm over his chest. “I sent you a text earlier! I asked you to please stop by the corner store on the way home, because you have the car and our power is out.”

  
“Oh…”

  
Tilting his upper body towards his goof of a boyfriend, Kurt narrows his eyes in accusation. “You forgot to turn your cell back on, again, didn't you.”

  
Bending down to scan through the contents of the fridge, Blaine squints with a mumble. “I'm sure there is something here we can eat...”

  
“The only thing we have are items that require electricity. Hints why I sent my ignored text…”

  
“Ayyy!” Blaine smiles in victory as he grabs a small box of _Buffalo Wild Wings_. “We still had some hot wings in the fridge!”

  
Taking the box out of the man's hands, Kurt cringes at the date scribbled in block lettering on the top of the container. “Ew! Blaine, no! Those are at least a week old!”

  
“So?” Blaine shrugs as he grabs the box back from kurt, licking his lips at the thought of finally getting to eat. “They still look good. Besides, there's enough hot sauce on these bad boys to preserve them till the end of time.” Picking up a flapper and biting into the meat, Blaine moans with satisfaction. “Mmm, yummy. Get in my belly.”

  
“Ugh. You're such a boy, Blaine Anderson.”

  
Putting the wing back in the box and placing it on the counter beside him, Blaine moves to cage Kurt in. “Mmm. But if I remember correctly,” moving his face close to Kurt's, “that’s one of the major reasons why you love me.”

  
Pushing Blaine away with a small shove, Kurt blushes with a deep flush. “Stop! You're going to get me sweaty!”

  
Motioning to step away, the shorter man shrugs with a fake sigh. “Well if you want me to stop…”

  
“No….Fine.” Kurt whines as he grabs his boyfriend back to him, placing his open palms against the sides of Blaine's face. “Finish your disgusting wings and meet me in the bedroom.”

  
“My win-”

  
Interrupting the man with an aggressive kiss, Kurt whispers. “Don’t leave me waiting.”

  
Shoving Blaine to the side, Kurt winks over his shoulder as he struts out of the kitchen and disappears into the darkness. His ass fading out of sight as it swayed from left to right, purposely enticing the ex-warbler with every swing and dip.

  
Picking a wing out of the almost forgotten box, Blaine takes a bite as his eyes stay planted on the spot where he last saw hurts vivacious ass. “Oh god.”

  
_“Baby...”_

  
Dropping the wing back into the food container with little to no care, Blaine rushes out of the kitchen while he licks his fingers clean. “Coming!”

 

* * *

 

 

  
Stepping out of their en suite bathroom, Kurt slowly starts walking over to Blaine, giving the older man time to ravish his naked body with those caramel coated eyes. “You like what you see?”

  
Nodding his head like an idiot, seeming to have lost the ability to function properly, Blaine lets out something between a whimper and a wine. _“Fuck_ , _Kurt_.”

  
Crowding the other's space, giving him no room to breathe or think, Kurt starts to lick and nibble on Blaine's jaw line. “Did my baby have a good workout today?”

  
All Blaine can do is hum in response – completely and utterly lost in Kurt’s ministrations. “Mmmm”

  
Enjoying the current sedated state of his boyfriend, the taller of the pair starts to pull on the drawstrings that kept the other man's sweatpants up. “Are you too sore to play?”

  
Teasingly pushing his boyfriend away so he can finish removing his pants and boxer briefs, Blaine winks with a smirk. “Oh, don't worry about me babydoll. I'm not the one who's going to be sore in the next few minutes.”

  
Inching away from Blaine until the back of his knees bump the firm mattress, Kurt decides to be cheeky. “ _Sure_. Ok.”

  
Eyes getting darker by the second, Blaine responds to his boyfriend's lack of belief with a step forward. “You calling me a liar, Hummel?”

  
“Whatcha gonna do about it?” Kurt teases as he lays down on the messy bed, moving to the top of the mattress to get comfortable, the burgundy comforter rumpled in a pile on his side side.

  
Crossing his arms behind his head in provocation, the soft brunette slowly spreads his legs wide and inviting. “Time to show up or shut up.”

  
Removing his sweat stained tee and tossing it to the floor, Blaine places a knee on the bed.“Why, Mr. Hummel” Lifting his other knee onto the soft mattress, bending his body over to slowly crawl up to the where Kurt is rested. “Is that a challenge?” Positioning himself between the laying man’s legs, “I don’t think you’re ready for what I have to offer.”

  
Grinning ear to ear, Kurt continues to provoke his boyfriend. “Yeah, sure, alright.”

Reaching his right arm down and grasping his growing cock firmly in his hand, giving it three slow strokes all while never breaking his eye contact with Blaine. “All this talk, yet no action?" Releasing himself in favor of caressing his own chest, tweaking his left nipple softly, “guess I’ll just have to take care of myself tonight.”

  
Moving a crawl forward, Blaine straddles one of Kurt’s thighs, taking his knee and rubbing it against Kurt’s groin.

“You wouldn’t dare.” Shadowing his naked torso over Kurt’s, bracketing his forearms on both sides of his boyfriend's head, he dips down to nibble at an ear lobe. “I know your body better than you even do.” Slowly trailing suction cup like kisses down the pale neck stretched out before him. “I can make you scream with just a flick of my index.”

  
Whimpering at the assault being delivered onto his neck, Kurt grabs a fist full of his lover’s damp hair and yanks the man’s head up to be parallel with him. “I dare you.” Sticking out his tongue to play with Blaine’s upper lip. “I fucking dare you.”

  
Opening his mouth and sucking on Kurt’s tongue, Blaine takes a hand and blindly reaches over to his nightstand. Fumbling to get the drawer open, he accidentally knocks over a burning candle. “Shit” He mumbles, catching the candle before it could potentially light the bedding on fire.

  
Pulling his head back, Kurt prods with hitch of his voice. “Please don’t burn the apartment down.” Shifting himself from under Blaine, so the other male could have easier access to him for prep, he continues. “We just signed the damn lease two weeks ago!

  
Rolling his eyes at Kurt as he finally gets the nightstand drawer open, Blaine reaches in to grab the almost empty bottle of Pina Colada flavored lube. Sitting back on his haunches, Blaine pops the cap with a cheesy grin. “I won’t.”

  
Squeezing a decent amount onto his index and thumb, rubbing the substance together in an halfassed attempt to warm it up. "Have a little more faith please.” Readjusting himself to the side of Kurt’s hips, moving his wet hand to his boyfriends’ entrance, he circles the rim with his thumb. “I’m not that much of a goober.”

  
Hissing at the chill of the lube, Kurt scrunches up his nose in reaction.

  
Leaning down to lay a peck on Kurt’s forehead, Blaine begins to insert his index finger. “Breathe, baby. Just relax, it will get better. Just wait.” Pushing past his knuckle, Blaine starts to pull out some and push right back in - picking up the pace with every push.

  
“Baby.” Kurt moans, enjoying the sensation of Blaine’s actions, rocking his hip into the other man’s hand. “Warm. I feel so warm.”

  
Breathing heavy into Kurt’s neck, working his wrist faster and faster, Blaine pulls his index out and slides it back in along with his middle finger.

  
“Yeah?” Curving the tips with a strong push of his hand.  “you feel that, Kurt?” Scissoring his two fingers deep within his boyfriend, in hopes of getting rise. "The heat we make together?” Working a grayish purple bruise beneath the laying man’s ear, “you crave it.”

  
“Yes, Blaine… oh, god” The warmth now taking a nasty turn. “Blaine!” Growing into a full burn now, no longer a slow crawl. “Get off!” Kurt panics as he tries to roll out from under his boyfriend. “Get the hell off of me!”

  
Squirming to sit, then stand, Blaine’s fingers still half buried inside him. “Get your fingers out of my ass!” Shaking his hips away from a concerned Blaine, “Holy mother of god." He yelps as he wobbles his way to their en suite bathroom - cursing to the heavens with every step. “My. Ass. Is on fire!”

  
Now perched at the end of their queen sized bed looking down at his fingers, Blaine finally registers his mistake. Scrunching up his face in full remorse, Blaine whispers into the dark room. “Oops.”

  
“Holy hell!” Kurt echoes on repeat.

  
Turning his head to face their bathroom, lifting himself up and grabbing one of the lit candles that sat on the dresser, Blaine puts on his discarded sweatpants and attempts to make his way across the dark room. “I am so sorry”

  
“Stay there. Don’t come in here.”

  
“Baby?” Blaine asks as he stops at the frame of the bathroom door, the only thing to be seen is the glow being imbedded from the candle in his hands.

  
Holding up the flickering light, using it to make out the outline of his lover, Blaine seeks his forgiveness. “Kurt, I am so sorry.”

  
Perched over the sink like a gargoyle, frantically splashing his ass with cold water from the running tap, Kurt shouts out into the shadows before him. “Jesus Christ!”

  
“Kurt…” Blaine pleads with a deep frown of concern, moving to the shelving above the toilet, opening one of the small cabinets and searching inside. “I think we have some baby pow-”

  
“DON'T YOU TOUCH ME!” Cutting Blaine off, the cold water doing little to stop the sting that is radiating from his backside, Kurt demands with volume. “Don’t move a muscle!”

  
Hurt and worry flowing his eyes, Blaine pleads. “Kurt, I’m only trying to help.”

  
Holding one buttcheek open with his right hand, Kurt uses his left to splash more cool water on his throbbing opening. “My ass is in pain, Blaine. The lining of my asshole is gone. You done went and burned the damn thing off!”

  
Putting the candle down on the side of the tub, Blaine moves over to Kurt and rubs his back.“I’m so sorry, Kurt.”

  
Shrugging Blaine's hands away, Kurt sneers. “Not as sorry as my asshole!”

  
Going back to the cabinet to look for some vaseline, Blaine replies with aggravation. “It can’t be that bad. Come on, let me help.”

  
Laughing out evilly, Kurt snarks back with a bite.

  
“Not that bad?” Never halting his splashes of the soothing water. “Oh, sweet grace” turning his head to face his partner, Kurt yells at the shorter man with thunder in his voice. “Not that bad?! How about I shove a bottle of Franks wing sauce up your backend and let you see how ‘not bad’ it is!”  
  
Jumping back at kurt’s volume, Blaine accidentally knocks over the candle that was sitting on the side of the tub. “Oh shit!”

  
Suddenly the loose flame catches the shower curtain on fire — devouring the silk in heated starvation.

  
“MY NEW CURTAIN!”

  
“Shit!” Blaine yells as he tries his best to stop the fire with a whack of a towel, jumping back when the towel starts to catch a flame, too. “Goddammit!”

  
“MY TOWELS!”

  
Rushing over to grab his boyfriend, Blaine orders Kurt to move. “Come on, baby! We have to get out!”

  
Still splashing his backend with cold water, the flames from the curtain now spreading throughout the bathroom, Kurt refuses to obey. “No! Leave me!”

  
Refusing to leave behind his boyfriend, Blaine throws a delusional Kurt over his shoulder and makes a break for the front door. “No way in hell I’m leaving you!”

  
Kicking and screaming with every throb of his ass, Kurt eyes widen in shock as the fire makes it’s way out of the bathroom and into their bedroom. “RUN, BLAINE! RUN! 

 

* * *

 

 

Storm now passed and the winds at bay, the boys stand outside their apartment complex alongside their neighbors, all in various stages of dress.

  
Looking on as their building rumbles with smoke and flame, the siren of the buildings fire alarm blaring off the structure with agonizing cries, Kurt and Blaine shutter as they watch the fire rise to another floor.

  
Kurt, fully naked, in terrible pain, and now being carried bridal style in his boyfriend's arms, pokes Blaine in the chest to alert him of an oncoming officer.

  
“Are you boys alright?” The officer asks as he gives Kurt a once over. Trying to figure out why the man, being held by the shorter man, was naked and hissing.

  
“We’re fine of-”

  
“It burns so bad.” Kurt interrupts, whimpering at the discomfort radiating from his rear end. No longer caring about his nakedness or location. “It burns so bad!”

  
“Why didn’t you say he got burned?!” The officer demands, turning his body towards an ambulance. “We got a 3 over here!”

  
Moving back to the two men, the officer tries to keep the situation calm as possible. “Everything is going to be ok. Keep him up for a little bit longer if you can.”

  
Readjusting Kurt’s arms around his neck, Blaine holds his boyfriend’s legs a little closer to his side. “No, you don’t understand. He’s going to be ok. We don’t need an ambulance.”

  
Grabbing the aid kit from the paramedic, the officer ignores Blaine's statement. “Nonsense, burns are no pass off.”

  
“You don’t understand” Blaine pleads to the paramedic and officer, desperately trying to get them to understand without him having to actually admit to the situation. “He wasn’t exactly burned…”

  
“Blaine. It hurts. Please make it stop” Kurt cries into his boyfriend’s neck.

  
“Where does it hurt, sir?” The paramedic asks, looking over Kurt’s pale skin trying to find the source of the pain.

  
Turning his head, Kurt cries out in distress. “My ass! MY ASSHOLE BURNS SO BAD!”

  
Both the officer and paramedic freeze in confusion, not exactly sure what to make of that statement. “The fire touched your anus?”

  
Shaking his head at that nonsense of a question, Kurt fires back. “What? No you idiot! My ass burns because this goof didn’t wash his hands off properly after eating hot wings!”

Looking back at Blaine with stress written all over his face, Kurt whimpers. "Why, Blaine? Why didn’t you wash your hands?” Tears of frustration trail down his cheeks. “It hurts so damn bad.”

  
“Wait.” The officer asks, trying his best to school his face and not laugh. “Your asshole burns, but not because of the fire… right?”

  
Nodding his head earnestly, Kurt pouts. “Yes, officer.”

  
Biting the inside of his cheek, trying his hardest not to burst out laughing at the situation, the officer continues. “Your asshole burns because…” Pointing at Blaine.

  
“Blaine” Blaine adds with a deep blush.

  
“Because Blaine prepped you with some hot sauce still on his finger… Did I get that right?”

  
Nodding his head with determination, Kurt confirms. “Yes, sir. It hurts so badly.”

  
Both the cop and paramedic share a quick glance, sharing a silent conversation between the two.

Not even a few seconds later, both individuals let out howls of laughter.

  
Casting a deep frown at Blaine, Kurt huffs. “Why are they laughing?” Kicking his feet in annoyance. "It’s not funny!”

  
“Puckerman!” The paramedic calls back over to the ambulance, clutching his sides as he giggles. “Puckerman, get over here. Now!”

  
Paling at the name, Blaine internally freaks. “No. Please no.”

  
“I knew the address sounded familiar!” Puck barks out with a shake of his head, smiling at his highschool friends. "Glad to see you two made it out ok!”

Turning to his fellow paramedic, Puck responds to his partners call. “What’s up boss?”

  
Trying his best not to laugh, the paramedic addresses Kurt and Blaine.

“Ok, boys. Here is Mr. Puckerman. Why don't you go ahead and update him on the situation”

  
Putting on a pair of protective gloves, Puck surveys the two men, looking over each one in an attempt to find the problem. “All ears guys.”

  
Squirming in Blaine's hold, Kurt straightens his back and lifts his chin up in false confidence. “Blaine and I were in the middle of making lov-”

  
Puck snorts at the slender man, running his hand over the back of Kurt's shoulders looking for damage. “You were making love and then what?” Moving to the front of Kurt, shining a small light in the boy's eyes, checking to see if they dilated properly.

  
Slapping Pucks hand away in annoyance, Kurt finishes. “Yes, making love, when somehow hot sauce go into my ass…”

  
Taking a step back, Puck looks from Kurt to Blaine, smirking at the lack of eye contact from the two. “Somehow? How does hot sauce _somehow_ get in your ass?”

  
Coughing with embarrassment, Blaine sways from side to side.

  
“Ah.” Puck laughs with a head nod, turning back to his partner, handing his flashlight over to the man. “Go check on the lady near the front entrance, I'll take care of these two.”

  
Turning his head back to Kurt and Blaine, Puck speaks. “Ok, boys. Follow me. And Blaine? Be Careful. The _asphalt_ is slippery here and we don't need you further damaging the princess’ goods.”

  
Letting out a huff at the nickname, Kurt cuddles closer to Blaine's chest, mumbling to himself. “I ain't no princess.”

  
“Shhh” Blaine soothes with a soft grin on his face, trying his best to swallow his laughter at Kurt’s adorableness. “Let's just get this over with and then we can find a hotel for the night. Ok?”

  
“Kurt?” Puck instructs as he pulls some items out of the ambulance and places them into a sterile bag. “I'm going to make you a 'To Go' bag to use later. It contains almost everything you will need to ease your...pain.”

  
Handing the bag over to Blaine, Puck goes to grab Kurt and place him on his side at the edge located in the back of the ambulance.

  
Taking some soothing cream and applying it to his finger, Puck reaches down to gently rub it in kurts rim, being professional and serious the entire time.

“It's really important that you flush yourself out multiple times a day for the next three. “Pulling his glove off and snatching a blanket out of a lock box that they use for people going into shock, he places it around the shivering man. “And no sex for at least two weeks. Understood?”  
  
Nodding his head in reply, Kurt thanks his friend. “Thank you so much for not making this awkward. I know how funny this all looks but thank you.”

  
Reaching in his back pocket to grab his phone to call a cab for the two boys, Puck winks over to Kurt and smiles. “Hey, this is nothing. I've once drove up on a scene where a guy was fucking a goat and his dick got stuck. This ain't nothing, Hummel. You good, bro.”

  
Going to sit down next to Kurt as they watch Puck walk over and wait for their cab, Blaine lifts kurt's head into his lap. “Hopefully we will be able to find a room in such short notice. It being the holiday weekend means most places will be booked.”

  
Snuggling his head into his boyfriend's lap, Kurt hisses with discomfort. “I don't care where we go, just as long as I get to lay down on my stomach and forget this night ever happened.”

  
“Hey, Kurt?”

  
“Yeah, Blaine?”

  
“I wonder if room services does wings...”

  
Reaching his hand up to smack Blaine upside the head, Kurt glares forward with his nose flared. “I hate you.”

  
Gently running his hands through Kurt's hair, soothing the other man with each pass of his fingers. Blaine looks down with a smile. “Love you, too, Kurt. Love you, too."

 


End file.
